Cuckolding and one-sided open relationships

Cuckolding
Cuckolding
The woman seeks partners outside the marriage with her husbands consent and support

The word Cuckold stems from the cuckoo bird, who famously lays her eggs in the nest of other breeds of bird, so that she side-steps the responsibility of looking after them.

In sexual parlance, the woman sleeps with another man, and cuckolds her husband.

Cuckolding is not a female-led activity, many couples outside of Female Led relationships enjoy this dynamic. But it is a technique often discussed in Female Led circles to empower the woman and emasculate the submissive husband.

It represents female freedom and the shattering of societal norms. As with all topics on this site, it’s a case of ‘each to their own’. Some women will be mortified by this sort of dynamic, some will be absolutely thrilled at the power and freedom it represents. What is important is the woman’s getting her needs met as a priority.

Similar to cuckolding are the concepts of poly households, whereby the Dominant woman chooses to partner or live with several different submissives. There is also the concept of one-sided open relationships (Such as the case with Will Smith and Jada Pinkett Smith) whereby it’s decided that the woman is free to pursue other encounters or relationships, but the man is faithful.

It’s important to note that there are many nuances to the cuckolding fetish, including the submissive man’s active participation or preparation of dates for his wife and so on, but it does not have to be the case. The man might be fully accepting of his wife’s power to sleep with other men but have no part in it. For example, a woman might travel for business, and might choose to explore sexual encounters or relationships in other cities. Before returning to the safety and security of a relationship with her husband at home.

From the woman’s perspective, she’s getting her cake and eating it. She has the freedom to explore her sexual desires and to get her needs met and go on adventures. Yet she also has the safety and security of the loving relationship and the solidarity of a supportive partner. A submissive man who not only supports her sexual adventures but is ready at home waiting with dinner on the table with a cocktail and foot massage on her return home.

Meanwhile a service oriented submissive man will be pleased to put his partners pleasure and happiness before his own. He won’t mind her extra-marital activity because he has confidence that she will return home to him, he is owned by her and he will be allowed the privilege to continue to serve her. Her satisfaction comes first.

Alpha women are naturally attractive to younger men, drawing them in like moths to a flame. A dominant woman may choose to cuckold her husband with these younger, more energetic men to get her needs met. As well as cuckolding him, she may also wish to lock him in a chastity device, so that he can’t even enjoy an erection whilst his wife is enjoying her sexual freedom. What a great way to smash through the norms and stereotypes of patriarchy and truly liberate women.

Cuckolding a man is a power trip, and many women will pursue this dynamic as a means of dominating and humiliating their husband. She may decide that her husband is good husband material, but feels she needs something a little extra that her husband can’t provide – her husband can cook, clean, provide and is good at worship, but maybe her husband doesn’t have much staying power? Maybe he is inadequate? Maybe she wants more than just his tongue once in a while.

Maybe she prefers him in chastity, he’s well trained, docile and obedient, why would she wan’t to upset this delightful servile man by having sex with him when she can discreetly take another lover when she pleases?

Any couple exploring this dynamic should tread with caution. It seems that many more talk about cuckoldry than who actually do it. The threat that your partner might do it, or has the freedom to do so, is often enough. It keeps a man on his toes and the power with the woman, the way it should be. Tread carefully, talk to each other about your feelings and enjoy this most thrilling of dynamics.

After a Dominant woman has been with another man apart from her husband, the couple should openly share their feelings and talk freely. The woman shouldn’t be made to feel any form of guilt or embarrassment. Her freedom and her needs come first. Similarly the man might need assurance that he is still able to serve his wife, he might be worried his wife will wander permanently.

A good ritual to embrace these fears is to bond with each other after the man has been cuckolded – he can kneel and worship his wife, express his love, emphasising how lucky he is to be owned by her. He needs to demonstrate how supportive he is of being cuckolded and how happy he is that his wife is sexually liberated.

Are you a cuckold or do you actively cuckold your partner? Share your experiences in the comments below.

Picture from Flickr

6 thoughts on “Cuckolding and one-sided open relationships”

  1. To your question, no. Attracted to alpha women, but no on cuckolding. I would prefer a monogamous FLR where my superior will retain final authority, and final decision-making, where She leads (and controls who handles Finances, Free Time, Household Chores, Life Direction, and Sex), but where I can be myself, and am contributing to the relationship in terms of my intelligence, personality, opinions, and where we decide together where I can act or decide independently from Her authority. Looking for a Superior who is open, friendly, approachable, but who is the authority. But no on cuckolding.

  2. I know I couldn’t personally handle being cuckolded .
    The closest I’d ever be able to get to is if a future Domme had a partner already and she could choose to have me clean her out after a “real man” has been with her .
    Depending on what she wants ste could choose to sissyfy me and her partner uses me sexually fir his orgasms while mine are few and far between.

  3. These relationships RARELY work for any length of time. The woman eventually holds her husband in contempt and he becomes entirely valueless to her. The husband looses his thrill, the jealousy loses its eroticism, he gets bored and it’s over for him for his reasons just as it is over for her for her reasons. It is, perhaps, one of the most destructive fetishes of all.

  4. I have been in flr and cuckolded by my girlfriend. It was a wonderful and extremely fulfilling experience. Seeing her happy and satisfied was a blessing to me. Serving her and keeping her happy all the time was my only source of pleasure. I never participated or watched her encounters with other boyfriends as both of us were never wanted to do that. We rarely had sex. We separated by mutual agreement due to some practical circumstances. I miss serving her. Would be happy to have that kind of relationship again.

  5. Cuckolding can be hot as hell, but let’s call all of this what it is, the re-enactment of traumas (whether reliving or reversing and for whatever reasons, but that’s what it is). It’s not smashing the patriarchy, it’s doing the exact same thing to men that you can get away with doing it to, i.e. those who didn’t end up on top in the broken system. Consensual indulgence in all its glory and it can surely be illuminating, enlightening as well as very enjoyable for both parties, but let’s not sugar coat or politicize it, other than that we can both agree that the abuse of power in today’s society among others is wrong! Interesting and titillating writing for the most part but this is where you spin out a bit! Thanks!

  6. “Her freedom and her needs come first.”

    I believe that is the money quote from your fine post. It is the North Star for those of us who are 100% faithful to our wives who enjoy the freedom to pursue their sexual satisfaction with whomever they please.

    We have been married for quite a long time and yes I am a cuckold. It’s not something I ever expected and I don’t think my wife did either. I love my wife and am supportive of her choice in this matter. I want her to be happy and fulfilled and to enjoy the greatest amount of sexual pleasure that she possibly can. I certainly don’t want her to have any feelings of guilt about her sexual activities nor should she.

    Our marriage was always wife led. She was always in charge. It intensified greatly 17 years ago when we became empty nesters. That was when she really turned the dial up on her dominance. Any inhibitions she may have had disappeared when it came to controlling me and making clear to me what my place and my role was in our marriage. She locked up my cock and my orgasms were strictly controlled and rationed by her.

    What I came to realize was that her primary motivation and what turned her on the most was the power. What I also came to realize (because she made it crystal clear to me) was that what she wanted most and insisted upon from me was immediate and unquestioning obedience and impeccable and unfailing service.

    About four years into this higher level FLR she decided that she had every right to take lovers and that she deserved to do so. She had only been allowing me 2 or 3 orgasms per year and it had been more than two years since we had penis in vagina sex. Cunnilingus was how she took pleasure from me. I know that at that point she viewed me much more as a servant than a husband. I don’t think she saw me as worthy of having intercourse with her. Besides, I didn’t excite her any more and she wanted sexual excitement.

    My wife has no desire to involve me or force me to watch and I have no desire to do that either. I know that is a powerful kink for some people, but not for us. She just wants the sex and for me to be supportive of her choices. And I am.

    Is it difficult to be a cuckold. Yes it is. At least for me it is. I haven’t had my penis inside my wife’s vagina in years. I am crazy mad in love with her, she is gorgeous and has a great body and I would give anything to be able to fuck her. On top of that I have to take the ego hit that comes from knowing other guys are doing it with her. A cuckold has to control his ego or it will drive you crazy. I constantly have to remind myself that my wife deserves this and that she is fucking younger guys who are better endowed and can please her in ways I can’t. That it would be supremely selfish of me to deny her the pleasure she deserves or to detract from her pleasure in any way by displaying anything but a cheerful supportive attitude before she goes on a date or when she returns home.

    I might add that in the ways I am allowed to pleasure her sexually I am hyper focused on her pleasure. I am finely tuned into her body’s reactions and try my best to do all the things I have learned give her the greatest pleasure. She may be fucking younger guys with bigger cocks, but I want to leave her thinking that no guy could ever eat her pussy as well as I do.

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